Hey! Just before I get into this week's blog post I wanted to showcase this performance of Oh How You Bend, live from Sandro's Alley. Bend is one of the subtler songs and has an awesome arrangement live (HUGE thanks to Johnsen, Alex, Dylan, Sydney and Sunny for that) so I really recommend you watch the video before reading the rest of the post. I do think it is one of the stronger lyrics I have written. Also, huge props to both Dylan Jepsen and Johnsen Cummings for working so tirelessly on these videos, Dylan with editing and Johnsen with the audio. Remember to click that bell! Anyway, in this blog post I will be continuing to shed further light on the zine I spent way too many hours writing in 2018. I am a little bit (very) embarrassed at the length I go at talking about One Piece here, but what can I say I was very passionate about One Piece at the time. It has such a good narrative! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Gigant: The project name for this track was “Arbes Samples” as it uses two samples from a talented three-piece band that went to my high school, called Arbes. The two tracks sampled are “Fortunes” and “Flutaar”. Flutaar’s sample is a subtle repitching, but I directly sampled the opening guitar melody from their song ‘Fortunes’ for the A-sections of Gigant. If you are not familiar with any of Arbes’s material do yourself a favour and wash some dishes whilst listening to either one of their EP’s. You will instantly feel better. My favourite track is ‘Beach Side’, from their first EP, Swimmer. Gigant is a German word meaning “giant”. Like “shame”, it was a word that got stuck in my head for many months. Of course, its relevance in my life was because the word is a part of attack names within the manga/anime One Piece. The lead protagonist’s (Luffy’s) special power is that his body is composed entirely of rubber, so he utilises this ability to inflate bones in specific parts of his body (usually his hands or feet) to incredible sizes before attacking the opponent. As Luffy attacks he yells out a standard attack name but slots in the word “Gigant” before the name of the attack. For instance, “Pistol” is when Luffy throws a punch and his arm hyper-extends forward and stretches out, vastly increasing its range. “Gigant Pistol” is this same style of attack but with an enlarged fist due to the bone in his hand having been inflated like a balloon, increasing its power but reducing Luffy’s mobility. For a fantasy pirate manga, One Piece uses a lot of real-life physics in its battle sequences. I’m not sure why but the word “Gigant” and the concept of “Gigant” always stuck with me, and because it’s stuck with me so long I take it as part of my personality and felt that I must express it through my art. I chose the word “Gigant” to be with this song because my obsession with the word was quite personal to me as One Piece isn't really trending or normalised as much as other pop culture in Melbourne. I’ve always really, really enjoy this song so naming it Gigant always felt right to me. The meaning of the word is also vaguely relevant to the lyrics of the song, fortunately. Hilariously enough, One Piece has had a surprising amount of influence on my songwriting all my life. One song that takes a lot of inspiration is a song from my other band Plaza-Trg, called ‘Harpy’. To avoid talking any more about One Piece for this zine (I hope): this was the second song I composed for the album but the fifth or sixth that I finished writing lyrics for. I wrote the composition for Gigant on a Friday morning in the Summer and it stuck itself in my head while I was making pizzas for the whole weekend. Writing lyrics for it was much trickier, however. This song is about being a part of something new and great that's entered your life. You're initially so glad that this new thing is here before you start doubting yourself because of your own fixation on this thing and feeling out of place with this new thing. It's a small-scale anxiety that I think subtly hints at what the rest of the album is going to be about. This song is also about a desire to belong somewhere. I personified this desire as a congenial partner that l yearned for. You want to be at this place so badly. You’re glad you’re away from where you were, but you’re always doubting yourself. You believe that you’re being judged at your new place, and that you’re not good enough for the place so you convince yourself that it’s not worth it. But in the end you see the absurdity of it all, and laugh it off. You're truly happy to be wherever you are, no matter where it is, while still longing for the place where you feel safe. I wrote the lyrics when my life felt to be in a period of transition. I was still adjusting to my first year of university, and being in intimate classes with very talented people who were recognised for their talents was really scary for me to adjust to. I was also at the age where people begin to think about life beyond their families and move out to live on their own, which is a lot to ponder for someone who takes their sheltered cosy life for granted. I wrote the lyrics for the sparser sounding section in one go, but the “drum and bass” section took many months before I was content with it. It was only really when I thought of the line “I can’t wait to walk through the final gate” that everything made sense to me. In the later sections of the song I talk about this “siren” that pops up in my life. A siren is a creature in Greek mythology who lure sailors with their beautiful singing voices and enchanting music to shipwreck on the rocky coast of their island. I was inspired to research sirens from a songwriting tutoring session with Harry James Angus from The Cat Empire, which I was very lucky to be a part of. A piece of advice he gave that really stuck with me was to take heavy influence from old mythology, because myths and stories hold their relevance because the core ideas and beliefs of such stories are taken from the core of human nature, which has not changed throughout history. I used the tale of the siren and compared it to entities in my own life that would woo me and lead me to my demise. In the song even though the siren is leading me away from my course I am completely aware that they will be the one to lead me to my demise in the end (“I know you’ll be the one to cast me onto the rocks”), and thus the line “I can’t wait to walk through the final gate” shows total acceptance and even eagerness towards my own death in this manner, as if it would free me from the burdens that I were carrying. I find that super interesting and, somewhat, empowering. I think I have the closest connection with this song. It’s written in Bb Ionian, which is a mode that a lot of my favourite music is written in, and was just a general joy to work on. I was refining this song and adding electric bass and guitar to it in my own time long before I had even conceptualised the album, so I feel as if this song is the one I care for most. I also recently realised that this song, while very much a song about wanting to belong somewhere, is also a love song, and probably one of the few optimistic love songs I’ve written (more on optimistic love songs with Dermo-Creme). This is especially apparent when viewed holistically, with the first few stanza setting the scene, then the complication comes in, then I dwell on everything that could go wrong, then I accept that what will happen will happen, concluding with the butteriest ending I’ve ever written. I’ll let you see why. Originally, I wanted Ruby-Sofia to sing this song, but after a recording rehearsal at my house I realised that her voice did not suit the style of lyric writing, as the way the melody leapt around for her voice reminded me of a country dance song. My final resolve was to use my own voice for the song, as I strangely put a lot of effort into the demo vocal for Ruby and Isaac, and as with each day that passed I enjoyed my voice on it more and more. I think I made the right choice in the end. I asked Alex to make the artwork of a young boy with some stereotypical child traits, like a bowl cut and a big grin with missing baby teeth, because a lot of this song evokes younger childhood memories and purer feelings for me. I chose orange as the background colour for the artwork as this song always reminded me of the colour orange, a colour which I always associated with nostalgia, and this feeling is especially apparent in the verses that convey a sense of relief. I really enjoyed using the word ‘lion’ as an adjective, and I hope to do it more often. Influences: Courtship Dating - Crystal Castles: I listened to a lot of Crystal Castles when I was younger, and I really enjoy their first album. Their first album has some very intense, high octane songs that I enjoy very much, and some moderately-paced songs that I didn't enjoy as much when I was younger and more of a punk. ‘Courtship Dating’ is the only moderately-paced song on that album that I always enjoyed. I remember when I made the opening section of ‘Gigant’ and instantly felt the need for a drum and bass section to follow it, starting on the submediant. I’ve only realised this now, but this is because the beat in the opening section of ‘Gigant’ is very similar to the beat in the opening section of ‘Courtship Dating’, through the hi-hat timbre and the infrequent kick drum rhythm. Following this section the song brings in a sine bass (I’m pretty sure it’s a sine bass (it is not a sine bass)) and uses a more dance-y beat as vocals come in. I guess the similarity between ‘Courtship Dating’ and ‘Gigant’ is what inspired me to subconsciously make my song so similar. I’ve also never really noticed this but the way the dancey section of ‘Gigant’ plays out is similar to some EDM where the beat feels like it is at half speed (usually through placement of the snare). I listened to a fair amount of EDM growing up (mainly Daft Punk, with Deadmau5 and Knife Party phases as well) so I’m glad that some of the tropes in those genres are finally showing in the songs I write. Night of the Long Knives - Everything Everything: I’m not sure why but it seems my favourite music seems to in Bb major or any of its correlating modes. Night Of The Long Knives is one of my favourite songs, period. There are so many interesting musical details present in this song alone that I borrow in my music. The polyrhythmic guitar towards the latter half of the song strongly influenced the final crescendo of Outside from my first EP. You’re going to notice that Night Of The Long Knives is the leading inspirational drive of this album, partly because of the strength of the word “Shame” in that song. This song takes inspiration from the IV - I chord movement in the chorus for the A section, and the B section’s syncopated melody on the guitar and bass accompanying a consistent drum beat. A Different Feeling - The Avalanches: My favourite Avalanches song, the way this song can leap between upbeat and lulling but still maintain that dancing energy definitely influenced this song. The beat also was a large influence. Late Night - Foals: A haunting song. The drum beat that Jack Bevan plays from about 0:53 to 2:20 always sounded so crisp to me, even through its simplicity. I really enjoy how the hihat is so repetitive but sounds so great and carries the beat so effectively. I listened to Two Steps Twice, arguably their greatest song, for the first time in a while and the hi-hat has the same effect there. Maybe that’s the “Foals sound” my friends always say I convey. Lyrics: So you stirred up the quiet ocean. Turned the tides in a lion way. And it’s clear when it comes from nothing at all. All my life, where have you been? But with this autonomy, am I glad? You could be the one to guide me under the knife. I can’t wait to walk through the final gate. And I love that they’re coming closer. But do they come with a loaded question? For I’m stuck in the fissure of stigma. I’m a slave to the me before me. And I hope that it’s almost over. And my heart knows it feels bereft. But it’s so damn hard to keep you away. And there’s hardly room to breathe. Don't. Can’t deny the need to feel ahead of the pack. It’s not like I let the world hold me back. I’m out where the giants roam. Footsteps and all. I can’t wait to give up, alright? These burdens are doubling. But what’s that coming up? A siren for me to chase out to sea? And where you aimlessly wander, I’ll shamelessly follow. And I know you’ll be the one to cast me onto the rocks. I can’t wait to walk through the final gate. And I know that you’re coming closer. And I don’t care that there are bigger fish. So please, just pick me up and take me away. For I’m warm in your gooey heat. Artist Influence - Everything Everything: Everything Everything is definitely the largest influence on me and this album. While their newer material boasts tight songwriting and incredible lyrics, the arrangements of some of their earlier songs are so wild and should not be discredited. There are so many of their songs that inspired individual tracks of this album that it wouldn't be a stretch to say that every song off this album is heavily influenced by an Everything Everything song. As I have already discussed, their track ‘Night Of The Long Knives’ influenced the name and artistic direction of the album as well as the style of many songs on the album. I got turned onto listening to Everything Everything at the beginning of 2016 by close friend Harry, the drummer of my other band, Plaza-Trg, and they have been a large part of my life ever since. I strongly connect with the views and beliefs that Jonathan Higgs conveys through his lyric writing, and it is a chief influence on my own songwriting. I was listening to their latest album ‘A Fever Dream’ almost compulsively when I was creating Shame, and both the lyric writing and song arrangements rub off onto this record. You Threw Me Away: To put it simply, ‘You Threw Me Away’ is about a relationship that declined. It’s written in this kind of acquiesced anger that rationally accepts what has happened over time but is very annoyed that it happened. I think a large section of my shame is taken up with misguided blame and the moral consequences that would follow. There is power in validation of your perceived truth, and whether that truth is right or wrong is irrelevant if knowledge you gathered is valid, even if misguided. The lyrics of this song are very much influenced by this philosophy, with You Threw Me Away containing the most viscerally written lyrics on the album. I wanted this song to be as empowering as possible for myself and listeners. I tried writing as succinctly and simply by overusing personal pronouns to create an overt sense of self (“I was ____, You ____, I thought ____…”), to allow listeners an easier avenue to empathise. The result of this is that I’m accusing throughout a large portion of the song, which is something I don’t usually enjoy doing, but as its purpose is to set myself at ease I’m fine with it in the short term. I feel that this is a very irrational pleasure to have. In retrospect, there were a lot of things that I could have done to amend the situation so that I could at least feel better about myself, but I can also justify why I was wired to act in such a passive and meek manner. The chorus concisely summarises my initial emotive reaction to the whole situation. Part of the reason I felt so worried during this partnership was that I felt like I couldn’t offer anything to my partner. I was a young, poor, skilless teenager who couldn’t drive or afford to go out, and didn't have much going on compared to friends my age. From a very superficial standpoint it was clear that I had very little to give at the time, so there was always a fear in me that I would be discarded for such reasons. Of course, I wouldn’t think anyone would be that shallow as to judge me for my things over my personality. However it is apparent to me now that this fear was really enveloping who I was to this partner, and that shifted my personality to not be at my full potential, and thus, ultimately lead to being discarded for these reasons. The chorus details how dumbfounded I was as I’d convinced myself that someone would actually dislike me for what I could not provide, and how I assure myself that people who act that way simply are not good enough for me (“Look at you / You mucked up / You threw me away”). One of my favourite lines is “Still I’ll go / I’ll grow up / I’ll drive a car / I’ll move out”. It describes my fixation to attain some kind of independence during the Summer after high school. The situation that I was in definitely drove a desire to be more independent but even after the situation ended those feelings were still there, if dormant. I also love the line “Look at me look at you!” because it’s demanding acknowledgement for my emotive response, and that conveys so much insecurity. I had so much trouble naming this track. The impulsive project name for this track was “June July & August”, quite possibly because the timbre of the arpeggiated chords remind me of something frigid and cold, like winter. The day I decided on the final title was when my friend was telling me about the importance of a chorus, many months after I had started writing this song, and how it should summarise what the contention of the song is in a few words or sentences. The example he gave was the song ‘Crazy’ by Gnarls Barkley. I told him that while the chorus of the song should summarise the contention of the song, the title should convey the meaning in just a word or a few words, and we all agreed. From that moment (whenever that moment was) that idea lingered in my mind, and when I realised I needed a title for this song I stressed out because I didn't really have an idea. I looked into the lyrics and tried to find something that summarised the song in just a word, or a phrase, and “You Threw Me Away” did just that. The only scrapped title worth noting was “Bending”, but with the existence of ‘Crashing’ I decided against another “-ing” suffix in a title. I'll probably use that title for another Orange Orange track. This was the third song I composed for the album, but the second last that I finished lyrics for. I wrote the lyrics for the chorus around the same time I initially created the song, but because I was trying to relate to feelings that I had long dispatched, I had much trouble writing the verses. I asked Alex to draw a bird's nest for me because you could liken the subject that I am singing about to a bird that has left their nest, while I sit in the nest and wait. Influences: Kemosabe - Everything Everything: ‘You Threw Me Away’ borrows heavily from ‘Kemosabe’, which is one of my favourite Everything Everything songs for its potent lyricism and progressions. While they both the second full song on their respective albums and both have four choruses, the arpeggiated chords used in the verses of ‘Kemosabe’ influenced this song the most. The line “My neurons, they slow me” was directly influenced by “Do you feel like your brain’s stopped delivering?” in the first verse of Kemo. Olympic Airways - Foals: The section beginning around 2:17 in Olympic Airways directly influenced the verses of this song. The chord arpeggiation on the piano directly imitates two guitars tremolo picking harmonies, and the dance beat influences the similar, wonkier dance beat used for this song. Night of the Long Knives - Everything Everything: The beat of this song is super similar to the beat of Night of The Long Knives. I was mainly inspired by the dancey hi-hats and the kick drum rhythm, and how the beat is present throughout the whole song. My Number - Foals: One of Foals’s bigger tracks, this song just sounds good. The way the vocal is constructed in this song (with a lower octave harmony) always pleased me so I tried emulating that for my verses. Also, I mimicked the iconic hi-hat fill present throughout ‘My Number’ with a similar but cheesier crash cymbal. I love it. Spring / Sun / Winter / Dread - Everything Everything: This is an instant Everything Everything classic. The ending section is the lyrics “You are a thief and a murderer too / Stole the face that you wear from a craven baboon / ‘Cos you did it to her and you did it to him / And you did it before and you’ll do it again” sung at a rapid pace over an outro crescendo likened to the main chorus. When I saw Everything Everything live this ending section was the one part of the set that really had people dancing and crashing into each other, and it made me think that the mindless blaming in the lyrics were instilling belief and strength into the audience. This really inspired me to write lyrics that avoid rationality and just try to express everything I had built up within me, especially for a dance-y song like this one. Lyrics: I was floating and restless. Swiping down the stream. You charmed me out when I sensed no vitriol bursting at the seams. In the succession of moments we lived through, I thought it was a dream. But, my neurons, they slow me, I’m running out of steam. Now, you tell me to wait for the moment. Throw my sword into the sea. So I succumb to play with my thumbs. It’s what I wanna be. In the past, I told me, “It’s all in my head, don’t worry.” But now I’m so… so dumbfounded. Not worth my time. Still I go, “I’ll grow up. I’ll drive a car, I’ll move out.” But look at you. You mucked up. You threw me away. And there you go, shaped by the world. Life is but a race. And here I am, fanging for you, clinging to my faith. “Why won’t you stay home and soothe my bare bones?” Is what I’d rather say. But you work so hard, and straight-forward. Push me out the way. In the past, I told me, “It’s all in my head, don’t worry.” But now I’m so… so dumbfounded. Not worth my time. Still I go, “I’ll grow up. I’ll drive a car, I’ll move out.” But look at you. You mucked up. You threw me away. I always thought that you went so much deeper, you petty little skunk. And I thought our ribs could coexist. I’m grieving like a monk. But, I get it, you human. So young and hungry. You want to reap from the world for your being. It’s what you wanna be. In the past, I told me, “It’s all in my head, don’t worry.” But now I’m so… so dumbfounded. Not worth my time. Still I go, “I’ll grow up. I’ll drive a car, I’ll move out.” But look at me look at you! You mucked up. You threw me away. In the past, I told me, “It’s all in my head, don’t worry.” But now I’m so… so dumbfounded. Not worth my time. Still I go, “I’ll grow up. I’ll drive a car, I’ll move out.” But look at you. You mucked up. You threw me away. Artist - April Whitmore: The first stanza of lyrics I wrote for You Threw Me Away was the chorus, as melody for the chorus came to me very quickly. The only issue was that I could not comfortably sing this melody. This is where the lovely April Whitmore comes into the mix. I first saw April as she was performing in the now-defunct Eat Pant, and I instantly loved her voice and how she projected herself, so she seemed like a perfect fit. She was very professional about everything and I am very happy with the way the chorus came out in the end. Her current band 'Janada' is superb, I thoroughly suggest you check them out. CYA next week.
- R
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